My friend Donald was kind enough to leave a comment on my previous foul-mouthed post, clarifying that I’m really a much nicer person in real life.
I’d like to think so too.
So why did I swear like a sailor in writing Unleashing Your Creative Monster: Know Who’s Your Bitch?
I struggled with writing that post for the longest time. I wrote drafts and drafts of my thoughts on creativity, things I’d learned through more than 10 years of studying and working in the creative fields. The drafts hemmed and hawed, went this way and that, and turned out bloated and boring. None of them worked. Creativity is a paradoxical subject and I was trying to cover all the different points of view possible.
As a result, the drafts didn’t have one single strong point of view.
When I finally decided to heck with it, I was going to write with my foot down and dammit if I missed anything, that the draft that became Know Who’s Your Bitch came into being, easily and quickly.
You see, the secret is very simple. In real life, I can be mild-mannered, fair and non-judgmental. In a conversation, I have the time to listen, to try to understand and see all points of view. Unless I turn out extremely boring, chances are you won’t bolt (chances are too that you’ll be more interested in talking about yourself than hearing me go on about me).
But on the written word, there’s no guarantee that you’ll stay with me beyond my first sentence. One sentence too long, one paragraph too winding, one passage too flabby, and it’s off you go.
On the written word I have to grab you by the throat, slap you silly with my point of view and still leave you panting for more. I have to say what I bloody well mean or shut up, because otherwise I’m just wasting your time.
Sometimes when I do that, it turns out flippant and sarcastic. Sometimes it doesn’t. But that’s the other thing about the muse and the creative process: you can’t always decide in advance how you’re going to end up. You can only follow your inspiration for the ride and hope you end up somewhere good.
I was nervous when I finished writing Unleashing Your Creative Monster: Know Who’s Your Bitch. I even wondered if I should publish it, if I would end up pushing it too far with the swearing. But as an artist – that fear of pushing the boundaries comes often.
You’ll always have to take that leap into the unknown, sometimes you’ll fall and sometimes you’ll fly. You have no say in the matter. All you can do is make what you need to make, do the damn bestest you can of it, and decide you’re either going to grow by taking a chance or stagnant by doing what you’ve always been doing.
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you have to stop being afraid of messing up or you will go nowhere. take the chance of messing up so you have something to work with down the road. it is called experience.
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